Russell Beattie

I'm constantly amazed at people's reactions to the word "fuck" in my blog. They can watch HBO daily, and it's okay, but seeing it in a blog is somehow shocking! HOW INAPPROPRIATE! SWEARING! IN A BLOG NO LESS! THE AUDACITY! And before they dare include a link, they have to warn their readers of "strong language". BE CAREFUL! STRONG LANGUAGE ALERT! YOU MIGHT SEE THE F WORD! HIDE THE CHILDREN! THE F-BOMB HAS BEEN DROPPED! NO ONE IS SAFE!

You'd think these fuckers have never watched the fucking Sopranos before...

What happens when someone reads the word fuck, anyways? Is there some sort of physical reaction that I don't know about that deserve such dire warnings? Like when epileptics see blinking lights and go into seizures? Are there really Pollyannas left out there that are so offended by the word they just keel over from their keyboards fainting dead away at the impropriety of it all?

Wait, I know! There are young children reading this blog who are now learning horrible, nasty words from yours truly... Is that what everyone is afraid of? In case you haven't kept up with the times, you can use the word "fuck" up to three times in a PG-13 movie. I can't imagine there's many kids under 13 who are reading this blog, and if they are, I'm quite sure they've seen the word fuck well before now. (Personally, I'm more shocked when I hear the word "bitch" used on network TV. That's not exactly a wholesome word either, but whoever made the rules decided that was fine.)

Another thing is that whole asterisk substitution thing. Someone will quote me, including the fuck and the shit, but replace them with f***k and s**t. What IS that? Seriously, that has to be the most moronic thing ever. Who are you fooling? You're writing fuck, you're just writing it with different letters. REALLY. You're NOT HIDING ANYTHING. You KNOW you're writing fuck, your readers KNOW you mean fuck, what is the point of the fucking asterisks? Think about it... these bloggers such prudes, they're actually going into my quotes and typing out the **'s so they don't accidentally cause offense or possible seizures or something. It's one of the most asinine thing I can imagine someone doing really. I wonder what kind of ass backwards puritanical world they live in that this would seem sane?

Fuck is just a word. I use it liberally when I don't feel like filtering (and I feel that by not filtering, the post will be better for it). So get over it, you bunch of pansy ass, oversensitive, hypocritical whiners.

-Russ